Missions

Something has been on my mind a lot lately...missions.

For about a year and a half, now, Australia has been strong on my heart.  I have no idea why.  I don’t even know anything about Australia other than Sydney Opera House, Citipointe Live, Hillsong, kangaroos, and it seems like an amazing place.  At first, I thought I just wanted to go to visit Citipointe Church, which would have been impossible on my budget, anyway, so I just kind of laughed it off.  But that pull toward Australia has not gone away.  In fact, it keeps growing stronger and I’m wondering if God is preparing my heart for missions there.  So, today, I decided to finally give this some serious thought and attempt to make sense of it.  (I’m one of those overly-analytical types.)

I’ve always had a heart for missions, but always in a sense of giving.  Never in a sense of actually going.  Last summer, I went through a 12-week discipleship training at my church (using the Real Life Ministries training manual)…I’d never heard discipleship or The Great Commission taught in such a way and it really sparked something within my heart.  Then my friend came back from a missions trip in Columbia and I longed to have that experience of reaching out to others, meeting their needs, showing the love of Christ, and gaining new brothers and sisters in Christ in other countries – helping them to grow in their faith and to love them and build relationships and encourage them to disciple others, as well.  I decided then and there I wanted to do that someday. 

But then Fall came, my last semester of college.  It was quite hectic, but I pressed on and felt like God was preparing me for something big.  I debated on whether or not to jump right into grad school.  After much prayer and guidance from the Lord, and after seeking guidance from those whom I respect and hold in high-esteem, I began grad school the following Spring.  At a youth conference in January, I received confirmation that I was definitely where God wants me, but Australia still has not left my heart and my mind.  The past month or so it has grown stronger and something was said at last night’s home group that got me thinking about everything.

We have two missionaries, Kenny and Lesley, from our church in Africa, right now.  I began going to Southside in January 2011 so I have never met them, but I hear about them often enough to feel like I know them…that is one thing I love about my church.  The relationships and love is so great there.  Anyway, I will try not to get off topic.  The past month or so, I’ve heard more and more about them, what they’ve been through, and their amazing faith through it all.  I’ve heard so much about the sacrifices they made.  All of that mixed with something said at home group last night.  Someone was talking about a missions trip they went on where they were unable to build relationships with those they led to Christ and they had no way of knowing, after they left, what happened to them.  All of this information, trying to make sense of this passion for Australia and missions, and everything that keeps getting brought up, I came to this conclusion.

I don’t want to set boundaries/limits on where or how God can and will use me.  To confine myself to Tulsa, Oklahoma seems ridiculous to me. I want to “GO,” no matter the cost and sacrifice.  When I sing, “I want to sit at Your feet, drink from the cup of Your hand,” I want to MEAN it.  I want to mean that I will go the ends of the earth as an ambassador in chains, proclaiming the gospel and building relationships with others, discipling fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, encouraging them to press on no matter the circumstances, no matter WHERE or WHEN God leads me to go and NO MATTER the sacrifice, and I want to do it with joy and gladness through every trial!

“But even if I am being poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrifice and service of your faith, I rejoice and share my joy with you all.” Philippians 2:17

Even if he DIES, he will rejoice.  Yes, I want to serve to that extent and I don’t want this to just be words.  I want to live it out.  That means taking risks and living by faith.  That means sacrificing comfort and “plans.”

I want to do missions someday, but one or two weeks does not seem enough for me.  I want to be able to build relationships, disciple, lead others to Christ or help them grow stronger in their faith, and stay in touch.  I want to take the time to build a congregation of believers that may help each other and encourage each other after I leave.  I want to share a piece of my heart and experience life and miracles with them!  I want to know that they have a place to meet and worship, even if that means taking the time and finding the money/resources to build it myself.  (And no, I don’t literally mean all by myself, but to work with others as a BODY of Christ.)

For me, I need a plan.  I need to know what is going to happen, when, and how long.  And the thought of giving up that stability, going somewhere, unsure of what to expect, is almost liberating, yet terrifying to me at the same time.   Liberating in a sense that you are trusting God and experiencing His power to open doors, provide, guide You, etc.  But terrifying in the sense of giving up control and the comfort I’ve known my whole life.  I think about everything Kenny and Lesley have sacrificed – stability on all levels – income, family, friends, bonding with people who speak your language, utility/appliance conveniences.  It made me realize that here, in the midst of provision surrounding us – jobs (even if they are mediocre), grocery stores and banks and churches and medical services or every corner, organizations to assist when in need, and THEN all the “extra” entertainment – we feel so “poor” and stripped and burdened, sometimes.  And then you look at Kenny and Lesley relying solely on God’s provision, without all of our conveniences, and He always provides (without the means of city limits).  What a lesson of faith.  I want that faith.  I want that joy and dedication to serve and steadfast faith that Paul had, regardless of the circumstances.  Does all of this mean I am going to Australia some day?  I do not know.  I just want to be ready and open to God’s calling if He leads me elsewhere and to not allow fear to hinder me.

John 17 is my prayer.

Matthew 28:18-20
^“18 Jesus came and told his disciples, ‘I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth. ¹⁹ Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. ²⁰ Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.’”

Prepare our hearts and minds, Oh Lord, and prepare the hearts and minds of those you are sending us to accept the words we plant into their hearts; that they may grow and flourish.  You will be glorified.